me

the tribe i am a descendant from believes a person will finally become non existent after they turn into a moth.
there is a moth flying around my room, so i smack it with my shoe, pick it up and throw it away in the trash. If that was really a person he/she would have thanked me. Horrible creatures.

why did i make this? well....to vent when i need to
and i need to

you see, there was this friend. of course, the moment we started to hang out i wanted to sleep with her. my problem has usually been distancing myself from sex. And it was becoming difficult to not have the urge to ravage her but i really enjoyed her company. the problem with sex is that is makes shit so complicated. i didn't want it to be the situation where we would be alone in the same room and there would be nothing to say.
silence
awkward silence
finally one night...ugh
after that
alone in a room with nothing to say
fuck
so i fuck her friend
fuck
its not awkward
but we cant hang out again
fuck
my luck is terrible
the first girl said i called too much after that night
it was the same as before we fucked
dammit
i lost a friend
oh well
why must emotions always get in the way?
casual lifestyle can get you in trouble
i drink too much
and I'm no good for anyone
but still
i know this girl, sweet, more intelligent than i can ever be and knows how to work
karma has a funny way of letting you know she is around
she doesn't want me
i deserve it i suppose